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In the brief lull of life change that I have been experiencing this week, I recently started to notice the other changes that have been occurring under the surface. These changes are in fact a result of what I was warned of many months ago - the "merging" process my guide told me was in process.

But I am getting ahead of myself. Let me start with some recent realizations I had that led to the conclusion I drew above.


Yesterday, while reviewing my previous blog posts, I read a few that reminded me of things my guides told me would occur. The first was that two people would help me. This was in July 2013 when I was struggling to accept that I was going to return to a job that was slowly eating away at me with the negativity it surrounded me with. I believe I have met both of these people. The first was the boss who initially hired me for the position I am now in. The second is the interim boss I now have.

How have they helped me? Well, the first, of course, she hired me and gave me reprieve from the horribly negative job I felt stuck in. But there was more to our meeting. As I got to know her I found in her a very wonderful person who wore her heart on her sleeve. Some would call her a bleeding heart even, but she was also a very strong and courageous being. Without going into her entire story, lets just say her life experiences put into perspective just how well-off I had it in life. She taught me that being emotional could be a strength and reminded me that my purpose was shared by many others. She also taught me the importance of having faith and trusting that God (or the universe) was fulfilling a larger purpose through me.

The second woman and helper is my current boss. Even though we had a rocky first few days together, she is already teaching me so much. This woman is an advanced being. She is much older than I am - she could be my mother - and the experience she brings to the table is priceless. Though she has never come right out and told me that she has spiritual gifts, she has revealed them to me with just a few statements and stories. For example, she told me a story about how she just knew that someone was stealing from her. It was one of those instances where she trusted her intuition and it proved right. When I expressed my surprise she said to me, "You are a smart woman. Some things we just know". The way she spoke to me and her expression as she did so caused me to pause and consider that maybe, just maybe she was here to help me.

I have heard that the people we meet in life come to us as a result of our thoughts/emotions/Spirit. Like attracts like. We bring to us what we need to see in ourselves, even if we do not want to see it. Sometimes we just need to know that we are on the right path. Other times we need to see that which is holding us back. And there are numerous other lessons and messages.

Who's In Control?

I have been having quite a few dreams lately where I am inside a vehicle. I have always considered those dreams symbolic of my life path. The vehicle represents my path and how well I am treading upon it. However, yesterday I was hit with another thought of what this could symbolize. Perhaps the vehicle is representative of this body that I am in? The physical body is the vehicle through which we experience life on Earth. How well we control our body and the mind that comes with it determines the success or failure of our life experience. For example, if you were driving a car and you fell asleep, what would happen? Well you would most certainly end up in an accident of some sort. If you are lucky you may just end up rolling to a stop on the side of the road. What would happen if you fell asleep in life? And in a car there is this handy, dandy instrument known as cruise control. As you may have learned from using it, cruise control is for cruising along on the same path. I think many of us get stuck on cruise control in life.

For some reason this thought came to me quite unexpectedly yesterday twice in the same day. Once, very appropriately, while driving home. The second time I was preparing for bed and kept thinking, "I am in control". The thought was more of an understanding of how it is to be Spirit in a body and what has been going on with me for most of my life. For the majority of my life I have not been in control. I have either been on cruise control or I have been asleep at the wheel. Not very good results come from that. I have to be awake. I have to know my vehicle and how to control it. Believe it or not, I know these things but so much of life gets in the way and makes me forget. It is time to remember.

One-Horned Liger

As I was preparing for bed last night and after thoughts of "I am in control", I began to feel that something somewhere was "off". It was barely perceptible but there. I did not panic, I pushed it aside and fell asleep. I figured whatever it was would come to my attention when it was suppose to. I fell asleep wondering what I would dream about, knowing that while I slept lessons were being learned. I  have been sleeping so deeply for so many weeks now. Surely something is going on!

The one dream I remember is very vivid. I was in my SUV driving along a country road. I was not driving, a male companion was. I was looking out my window as I typically do when riding in a car. As I looked, I saw animals. First, I saw a small group of cow elk grazing along the side of the road. I pointed them out to my companion. Then I saw what appeared to be dead pigs and I also pointed those out saying, "I think I just saw a dead pig!" The last animal I saw was out of place. It looked like a large tiger but it had a single, white, spiral horn coming out of its head. It was sitting down and the horn was as long as half of its body!

I said to my companion, "There is a liger!" We discussed him for a little while. I asked if they were common and he said they were. He told me they ate a certain animal, though I can't remember its name now. It was an animal that normally lives in Africa, though. I then saw a map in my mind that showed the range of the liger. The areas where ligers could be found were surrounding a small circular area in the middle. I remember feeling worried about encountering one. I was also surprised at how it looked, especially the single, spiral horn on its head. I also remember seeing the familiar orange stripes of the tiger when I first saw it and then it paled to almost a white color the next time I saw it.


Elk - A symbol of strength and endurance. It can also indicate that one needs to spend more time with

friends or eat a healthier diet. In my case it likely is the former.

Pig - Represents dirtiness, greediness, stubbornness and selfishness. Since the pigs I saw were dead, then it likely represents the end to such things. Yay!

Tiger - Since ligers are a mixture of a lion and a tiger, the symbolism would also be. Tigers represent personal power and one's ability to exert it. Seeing one can symbolize the need to take on more of a leadership role in life. For me, this symbols says, "Take control of your life!"

Lion - The lion represents great strength, courage, aggression and power. It also indicates that the individual will overcome emotional issues they are struggling with. My overall message here is, "Balance".

Horn - The horn of the unicorn has strong spiritual significance. The horn rises out from between the eyes where the third eye is located. This symbolizes intuition or spiritual sight. It also represents freedom from the ego-driven desire to acquire material wealth and the journey to the higher dimensions of Self.. It can also indicate a transformation from 3rd dimensional consciousness to the 4th and 5th levels.

Overall, the dream is a very promising one. I believe the animals are representative of my transformation. The elk is where I started, the dead pigs are what I learned and the liger is where I am at. I showed fear of the liger but was reassured there were many more (more like me). The impressive horn represents my end goal - to rise to higher states of consciousness and clear myself of that which impedes my progress in this life.


Now back to where I started out with this blog. How does all of the above tie into this "merging" my guide told me about? Well, from my understanding of the process, my guide, or Higher Self, will slowly become more and more integrated with me. In other words, my knowingness will increase and will be perceived differently. So far I have begun to notice subtle differences in my knowingness and overall they are pretty mind blowing.

Knowing What to Do

One subtle difference I have perceived is that I am getting messages on what to do when I need to do them. For example, I knew/was told it was time to "leave" my current home and move to a new one. The knowingness came with a strong feeling as well. What is mind blowing about this is not that I was told something but that I followed through and did it. When I did it everything moved very fast toward a very positive end result (that is still in process). I normally resist when I get such messages/urges. Why did I listen? Because I have changed.


I am more in control of my emotions and my reactions to life and people. I just am. I don't know exactly when it happened but this morning it became very real to me.

I was awakened by my husband early and he began telling me of his upset from the night before. I realized that was what I perceived prior to bed and listened to his story. He continued to talk most of the morning but got very irritated at one point and began to try to start a fight. This is unlike him. Usually I would react and fall into the pattern of arguing with him, but this time I felt separate from it; like an observer more than a participant. I was very aware of what was happening and very calm. Because I was like this, the fight never happened. Instead, I felt victorious. I also realized that what I experienced could happen all the time. I am in control.

I am Not My Body

Logically, I understand that I am not my body. But spiritually, at a deeper level, I don't think it really hit me until this morning after I avoided falling into usual patterns.

In Scientology, the body is a vessel only and the Spirit, or thetan, controls it; is the captain. We, the captain, are not actually inside the body but we surround it. This is hard to digest as we often think of ourselves as inside our bodies. For me, I think of it this way. We surround the body and use the various energy points (chakras) to control it. We also control the mind. Without us, there would be no mind but merely a reactive organism.

Like one learns to drive a car, we have to learn to "drive" the body. But the body is complex. It is reactive. Nature made it that way in order to survive. The body reacts in various ways - fear, anger, sexual desire, jealousy, etc. As the captain, when we encounter these intense emotions they can be overwhelming. When overwhelmed we shrink back; withdraw. That leaves the body to continue on its reactive course while we recover. That is why when we find ourselves overwhelmed with emotion it can sometimes seem unreal or we may have trouble remembering or even understanding what happened "to us".

The key here is to not pull back our energy. We must stay in control. We must rid the body of its reactiveness so that we do not suffer from it. We must be courageous and balanced. When we are balanced and in control of our emotions, we can see life clearly, make better decisions and stay focused on our goals. Manifestation becomes second nature, because we are ourselves masters of creation. And when the reactive body/mind is not in control, our creative potential shines.

Ultimately, the merging process is that I am growing more aware. Aware of my body. Aware of myself. Aware of the unlimited possibility that exists for me. I am not my body. I am a powerful, spirit/thetan who is learning more about themselves and the universe through this very challenging experience called Life.


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